Commencement

Tomorrow is commencement here at Alluvial Flood Plain University... I enjoy it a great deal... I get to see students make/take that next step in their lives... I tell them that tomorrow after you receive your diploma... and make that next step, you are now one of US... you are no longer a college student... and things will change so...

A really intriguing part is getting to meet the Moms of the students I've been teaching...  needless to say, some are really sexy... should I say that about student's Moms?

If you watch the NFL, you know that coaches get to review certain calls made on the field... all they have to do is throw the red flag...

I tell my students that I am wanting to invoke some kind of a "diploma review" process... that each professor in attendance should get a red flag... and if they hear a student's name called... that in their opinion, should not graduate, the prof gets to hurl the flag high into the air... 

So... they are calling the names of the recipients... "Joe Blow"... and about that time, a flag is hurled... and the provost has to say... "One moment, please... this diploma has been challenged..." so that student has to step aside until the grievance has been resolved... and then the provost gets to say something like, "upon further review, this diploma has been denied..." or... well, you get it...

My students tell me that I am a difficult professor... that I make unreasonable demands... and I reply with... no... the unreasonable part comes into play when you get a real job... and that I am trying to get you ready to deal with that environment...

A few years ago, I went to watch a high school football game... we have a team here in MS that is just too good... they are a machine... at half time, they were beating the hell out of this other team, so I decided to go get something to eat, and head back home.  

I got seated at the grill... placed my order... and was waiting... and I noticed a couple at a table on the other side looking my way... and smiling...  I didn't know them... and figured that they must have been looking at  someone else...

He gets up and walks over to my table and asks me... "Don't you teach at Alluvial Flood Plain University?"  I told him that I did... and he says, "I thought that was you!  You cussed me out in class one day!!"  And I thought... "Oh fuck... I'm about to get shot, beaten, something..."

Being a rather quick thinker, I tell this guy that I have no memory of that happening... (and I really didnt) and asked him to tell me about it...

He goes on to say, "you really didnt cuss me out... I was notorious for coming to class late... and this one day I was really late..."  He said that I asked him to stay after class was dismissed... and that I told him that by continually being late, I was being disrespectful to his classmates... being disrespectful to me (teach), but most of all, that he was being disrespectful to himself...

He said, "it took a while for that to sink in... but I finally got it!"  He told me that he was a banker in Memphis now, and that the Memphis Business Journal recently did an article on him... and they were wanting to know if he had a professor from college that made a difference in his life...

And he said he did... and he told them of the teacher in red shoes that told him that he needed to respect himself...  That made my evening... that plus not getting shot... or stabbed... or something like that...

Tomorrow will be a new beginning for those "kids"... but Life is full of new beginnings...  We just have to be alert enough to know when they present themselves to us... and for us to know when to take advantage of them...