I've written in my journal that I use a "balance sheet" approach. The Balance Sheet formula is "Assets = Liabilities + Net Worth" or Net Worth = Assets - Liabilities."
I like to think that I benefit from all of the people that I know... that I have learned from... that have made me a better person... and the sum of all of those experiences go on the Asset side of the Balance Sheet.
I have worked hard to remove the "H-word" (Hate) from my vocabulary... it doesn't benefit me at all to have those feelings and emotions about someone. If there was someone that I did harbor these kinds of emotions toward, he/she would go in the Liability part of the Balance Sheet... so then, my "Net Worth"... my total benefit to me from all of the people I love or have learned or benefited from would be that summation less the people I disliked.
In business, one's goal is to maximize shareholder wealth or net worth. The best way for me to maximize my net worth is to not have negative feelings towards anyone... not to hate anyone... It's been easy for me to not hate others, but I do have negative feelings from time to time about others...
My objective... my goal... has been to maximize my personal 'Net Worth' by not having anyone in the Liability section of my Emotional Balance Sheet... therefore, my Net Worth is equal to Total Assets... ( zero Liabilities).
It's difficult... I have a sister that loves to fuck with my head... an ex that likes to tread through there from time to time, but even then, they are just nuisances... not anyone that I would hate or consider an enemy.
If there is someone that I find myself not liking, I try to move myself to a level of 'Indifference' with them... and that level of "Indifference" is assigned a value of zero...
This has been a pretty ok way for me to live my Life... It seems to work for me...
~shoes~
PS: I think too much...
PS: I think too much...
This cracked me up...speding too much time wrapped up with business books? Still, I can relate. Good post, I'm glad I stumbled upon it!
ReplyDelete* JennA... yeah, WAY too long... I've been teaching this stuff quite a while and go through spells where I try to break out of this mindset... however, I keep getting sucked back into it... I'm glad you stumbled upon it as well... :o) ~shoes~
ReplyDeleteThat makes sense. I am as indifferent to my ex as possible. I can not be indifferent to my boss and co-worker though. And I do not like either of them very much.
ReplyDeleteHi there, Bathwater... yeah, it makes sense to me... I read somewhere a while ago about forgiveness... when we forgive someone, it is something we really do for ourselves... so we don't carry around a great deal of anger, etc... this is the same thing...
ReplyDelete~shoes~
It makes sense. Why would we want to be afflicted by negativity? I'm into reading on happiness and what really matters in order to improve our lives. Negativity only eats you from the inside.
ReplyDeleteAnd I think too much as well. :)
I don't know anyone personally that I hate anymore. It feels good to no longer have the welled up anger boiling inside me. Trying not to get people angry and avoiding hostile people works for me.
ReplyDeleteSecretia
Good morning, Spring Flower and Secretia... I agree... it IS about us...
ReplyDeleteI think I've told of the sister(executor of my Dad's estate) that screwed the family out of about $400,000... I was so angry about that... and that anger wasn't working FOR me... so as part of my spiritual growth, I forgave this sister... My brother is still angry with me because I forgave her... and he is still angry about what she did... and the anger is consuming him. I've tried to explain to him that my forgiving her was all for me... not for her... and I did remind him that although I had forgiven what she did... I hadn't forgotten... never forget... ever...
~shoes~