Monday, February 4, 2013

"When I Get Older..."





Losing my hair…

Many years from now…


Will you still be sending me Valentines...
Birthday Greetings, Bottle of Wine...

A little old man shuffled slowly into an ice cream parlor and pulled himself slowly, painfully, up onto a stool.. After catching his breath, he ordered a banana split. 
The waitress asked kindly, 'Crushed nuts?' 
'No,' he replied, 'Arthritis.'

A man was telling his neighbor, 'I just bought a new hearing aid. It cost me four thousand dollars, but it's state of the art.. It's perfect.' 
'Really,' answered the neighbor . 'What kind is it?' 
' Twelve thirty..' 

Three old guys are out walking. 
First one says, 'Windy, isn't it?' 
Second one says, 'No, it's Thursday!' 
Third one says, 'So am I. Let's go get a beer..'


BAH...

Humbug!!!!!

~shoes~
Posted by at

29 comments:

  1. AnonymousFebruary 4, 2013 at 4:07 PM

    Bahahaha!!! Hilarious!! I especially like the picture... disgusting, yet strangely entertaining :)

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    1. Red ShoesFebruary 4, 2013 at 11:11 PM

      Greetings, O... :o)

      I always try to find something from time to time that.. is disgusting, yet entertaining... :oD

      I trust all is well with you!

      ~shoes~

      Delete
  2. Ryan BeaumontFebruary 4, 2013 at 4:37 PM

    An old man and his wife enter a doc's office for his check-up. The doc asks the man "what's your age?" The old man says "what?" The wife says "he asked you your age, he's 84" she tells the doc. The doctor then asks the man "do you have any allergies?" The old man says "what?" The wife responds "he asked you if you have any allergies; he doesn't" she tells the doc. This goes on and on. The doc asked questions, the man asking "what" because he can't hear, and the wife, in exaspriation responding. Finally the doctor tells the old man. "Sir we are going to need a stool sample. The wife turns to the old man and say "give him your undershorts."

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    1. Red ShoesFebruary 4, 2013 at 11:14 PM

      Good evening, Ryan... LMBO!! I've heard that in several configurations, but it always strikes me as very funny...

      I have found that I have gotten older, that the questions that the drs now ask do border on things like that... Hahahahaha...

      ~shoes~

      Delete
    2. Ryan BeaumontFebruary 4, 2013 at 11:19 PM

      You know back in the day we used to say if you shake more than 3 times it's considered pleasure. Now you have to shake 10-12 times or else you leave behind embarrasing remnants!

      Delete
  3. Cocaine PrincessFebruary 4, 2013 at 5:17 PM

    First pic-- OMG it took me a second for that joke to sink in. Very funny.

    PS: Hope you're feeling better. :)

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    1. Red ShoesFebruary 4, 2013 at 11:16 PM

      Hi there, Princess...

      Yeah, that one kind of catches one unawares...

      I'm somewhat better... I just get colds/fl, and seem to have one Hell of a time shaking them. They seem to settle in my throat, and end up with my losing my voice for a time... I'm flirting with that right now... blah...

      Not good for a teacher...

      I hope all is wonderful and great with you!

      ~shoes~

      Delete
  4. RobinFebruary 4, 2013 at 5:26 PM

    You must be feeling somewhat better. At least you are telling jokes. This is good. Laughter is good. You made me laugh. I like it....

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    1. Red ShoesFebruary 4, 2013 at 11:18 PM

      Hi there, Ms Robin... for the most part, I am better... I just need my voice to return... it's difficult being a somewhat pompous professor when one doesn't have his voice.

      :oD

      ~shoes~

      Delete
  5. Kalei's Best FriendFebruary 4, 2013 at 5:47 PM

    Now this is not a joke... I had a check up and the doctor who has to be in his very late 40's told me he went and saw the Who perform.. I was surprised they were still around.. He said there were only 2 since the the other 2 were deceased.. NOW that is enough to make one feel old especially if you grew up listening to them.

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    1. Red ShoesFebruary 5, 2013 at 9:52 PM

      Hey, Chris... yeah, Keith Moon died way back when... 1978, I think. Roger Daltrey and Pete Townsend are still here. John Entwistle... here just in the past couple of years.

      I hope all is well with you...

      ~shoes~

      Delete
  6. BluezyFebruary 4, 2013 at 6:40 PM


    Great post!

    ReplyDelete
  7. JJFebruary 4, 2013 at 8:41 PM

    Shoes: Have you been hanging aroung with Joe Theismann?

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    1. Red ShoesFebruary 5, 2013 at 9:58 PM

      HA!!! It sure sounds like it... doesn't it?? It's amazing how far we fall when we fall...

      ~shoes~

      Delete
  8. red.neck chicFebruary 4, 2013 at 10:17 PM

    Geritol.

    I could add hearts to the tennis balls on your walker... I'll send a new set each year, so yeah... You'll still be getting Valentines. And for your birthday I could add lights to the tennis balls. Kinda like lit spinners, but for a walker.

    Feel better now?

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    1. Red ShoesFebruary 5, 2013 at 10:04 PM

      Geritol? For Iron poor blood??

      Hearts on my balls?? And lights??

      That sounds painful...

      No...

      ~shoes~

      Delete
  9. MaxFebruary 5, 2013 at 9:32 AM

    Hilarious! :-)

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  10. Same sassy girlFebruary 5, 2013 at 7:27 PM

    Teachers don't grow old... they just lose their class!

    Hope you're back squawking at them thar youngsters soon!

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    1. Red ShoesFebruary 5, 2013 at 10:08 PM

      "Teachers don't grow old... they just lose their class!"

      That's me to a 'T!'

      I can't get my voice back!!! AUGH!!!

      ~shoes~

      Delete
  11. AnonymousFebruary 6, 2013 at 9:36 AM

    Hahaha! Oh, Shoes....

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    1. Red ShoesFebruary 8, 2013 at 11:00 AM

      Good morning, Jessica!

      How are things in your neck of the woods??

      ~shoes~

      Delete
  12. dixiebelleFebruary 7, 2013 at 8:45 AM

    lol thanks for the chuckle this morning Shoes! I needed it =) Have a great day!

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    1. Red ShoesFebruary 8, 2013 at 10:58 AM

      Good morning, Dixiebelle...

      How's the weather up your way??

      ~shoes~

      Delete
  13. musicwithinyouFebruary 8, 2013 at 6:11 AM

    I would give you flowers and wine no matter how bad you are falling a part. Thanks for this post I love jokes about us getting old.

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    1. Red ShoesFebruary 8, 2013 at 11:00 AM

      Good morning, Liz... did all of the snow and such set it up there??

      Getting old isn't a joke any more!!!! *cries*

      ~shoes~

      Delete
    2. musicwithinyouFebruary 8, 2013 at 8:22 PM

      Hey Shoes ...

      We got lucky. The snow hit in Michigan and spared Upper Indiana.

      Delete
  14. Blue GrumpsterFebruary 8, 2013 at 2:31 PM

    This shit sure isn't what I expected, Shoes. Losing my hair, lising my muscles. What's next... my mind?

    ReplyDelete

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