Wednesday, October 19, 2011

"In Memory Of A Friend..." Updated...

I've known Jane for quite a few years... she was married to a colleague in the College of Business at Alluvial Flood Plain State University...


Her husband always had a ton of "good ideas"... just none were very focused... he was like a toddler on Hawaiian Punch... just all over the place.   Jane was a sweet heart.


One day, I was having lunch in the Union, and she and her husband were in line ahead of me, and she turned to speak to me... and I told her how much I loved what she had done to her hair.  It was really nice... really attractive...


"It's a wig," she told me... and I immediately knew that I had just put my foot in my mouth...  I felt so bad... I've had a history of saying the wrong things at the even more wrong times... but I didn't know.


Jane was a mortgage banker... well liked... well respected... her husband was a... well...


He moved away looking for a better job... more money... an opportunity.  Jane didn't want to move... she stayed here with her job and her friends. 


Jane died Sunday...


There's so much more I could write... but, it doesn't really matter. Do take care of yourself... do the exams... 

~shoes~


I just returned from her funeral... the choir sang this during the exit... how appropriate... it is SO something she would have selected...

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19 comments:

  1. Wine and WordsOctober 19, 2011 at 11:11 AM

    It does matter. It matters to you, so it matters to me. There's been so much loss for you lately. But I've said that before. I feel like it's all been said before. Trite. And none of it really helps. ((Hugs)) Shoes. Your poor tired heart is so big.

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  2. Cocaine PrincessOctober 19, 2011 at 12:04 PM

    My thoughts are the exact as Wine and Words.

    The pink ribbon campaign is near and dear to me but it's something that shouldn't be just expressed or being made aware during the month of October- it really needs to be addressed year round. So often women are so busy looking after other aspects of their lives and people, we sometimes forget we need to take time out and take care of ourselves.

    There is truth is the phrase: "Early Detection Is The Best Prevention"

    Recently I read this sign too which I thought was humorous: "Grope Your Wife. Save A Life"

    The slogan was accompanied with a picture of a husband groping his wife's breasts and in between them a beautiful pink ribbon.

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  3. nitebyrdOctober 19, 2011 at 12:57 PM

    Jane mattered. I'm so sorry. She'll be in my thoughts as I do "Barbells for Boobs" later this month.

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  4. red.neck chicOctober 19, 2011 at 1:16 PM

    I don't have the right words... I am sorry for the loss of your friend.

    Cancer is so ugly and ruthless. :(

    All of my love and hugs to you.
    xoxo
    robelyn

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  5. BBOctober 19, 2011 at 3:32 PM

    Oh Shoes...I am so very sorry. It's such a horrible disease. When I get back from my trip to CT, I am making an appointment. I'm overdue. Thanks for reminding me with this post! Big Hugs!

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  6. Monkey ManOctober 19, 2011 at 4:42 PM

    Sorry for your loss. Cancer can be unforgiving. Treatment can be awful. I am a grateful survivor but feel for your loss.

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  7. AnonymousOctober 19, 2011 at 7:24 PM

    I'm sorry. I'm so sorry. I wish I had better words to assuage the pain and grief. Know that you and yours and Jane and hers are in my thoughts tonight.

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  8. Green MonkeyOctober 19, 2011 at 8:50 PM

    ummmmm...... sadness. I feel your sadness shoes. ((((monkey hug))))) salute to Jane. fly free ~

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  9. AnonymousOctober 19, 2011 at 9:22 PM

    oh, there aren't words... so sorry. thinking of you. may she rest.

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  10. shrink on the couchOctober 19, 2011 at 9:58 PM

    I'm sure she was pleased that you found her hair attractive. Women are insecure about their wigs, too.

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  11. A Beer for the ShowerOctober 20, 2011 at 7:47 AM

    We're both sorry to hear this, and as the others have reiterated, it does matter. Also, I don't think complimenting her wig was a bad thing. If it was sincere, it was probably very flattering. Lastly, I love that song (and most of the soundtrack from O Brother). What a great song to send someone off with.

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  12. Nancy/BLissed-Out GrandmaOctober 20, 2011 at 1:17 PM

    You have created a wonderful tribute to Jane in just a few words (and a pretty good description of her husband, too!). I'm sorry she lost her battle with cancer. I love the music, and I'm betting that she did select it. Take care.

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  13. AnonymousOctober 20, 2011 at 2:51 PM

    A Time for Everything

    Ecclesiastes 3:1-8 (The sum of our life's journey.)

    R.I.P. Jane

    Gracie

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  14. AnonymousOctober 20, 2011 at 3:19 PM

    RIP, Jane.

    What a touching tribute, Shoes. I am so sorry for your loss.

    xoxo

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  15. UBERMOUTHOctober 21, 2011 at 2:53 PM

    I thought I'd come here for a bit of a cheer up. :(

    RIP Jane.

    Cancer is a terrible way to go.

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  16. AnonymousOctober 26, 2011 at 12:18 PM

    I'm sorry about your friend. It is always unnerving when death takes someone close to us and reminds us how short life really is.

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  17. Green MonkeyOctober 27, 2011 at 9:47 AM

    Where are you Shoes? I found a pair of shoes on royal street. Even though they were not red I thought of you.

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  18. Red ShoesOctober 27, 2011 at 1:10 PM

    @ Annie... yes, it does matter, I suppose. I am getting tired, I think. I didn't go into this semester of school with a great deal of enthusiasm... and what I had has waned over the past few months. I feel "Lost."... Thank you for your kind words.

    @ Princess... yeah, all in all, there are many benefits to groping... ;o) As for taking time to take care of ourselves, you are right there as well... Thank you for your words.

    @ Nitebird... Jane did matter... it was just that I wasn't sure that writing on and on about her did... I guess as long as I felt what I did for her and the loss of her, that was enough. Thank you.

    @ Hey Gobbles... thank you. :o)

    @ Bouncing Barb... hey you... Please do take care of yourself. Life is full of reminders like this.

    @ Monkey Man, Joshua, and Green Monkey... Hmmm...the monkeys are wild here... Thank you for your thoughts... I SO appreciate that!!

    Class time... I'll be back later... thank you all so much for your kind words...

    ~shoes~

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  19. KimberlyNovember 1, 2011 at 10:00 AM

    Awww...my thoughts are with you.

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