Today is a bad day...
It's been a bad couple of weeks...
it's been a bad semester...
it's been a bad year...
Liam Larry... a source of quite a few of my posts has taken a turn for the worse, medically. He just won't take care of himself. This past Friday, there was a commotion in his class room... he became incoherent, he started rambling, he started talking about dying, he broke out in a bad sweat... one of the students became concerned and sought help from another faculty member. An ambulance was called, and medical attention arrived. I was told that when Liam Larry was hooked up to a heart rate monitor, that it was mostly flat-lined with just minimal ticks where his heart beat should have been... he blood pressure was 72/38...
He has been a time bomb this semester... just a host of medical issues, emergencies... he would say things that would anger his friends and colleagues... he has just been a difficult person to be around...
He was told that he would not be allowed to come back to work without a medical release from his physician... he saw his doctor yesterday and the doctor wouldn't allow Liam Larry's return.
His Mom and sister are here to get him... they are going to take him home. His Mom, age 80, could beat Liam Larry up if she
They were all here in the building a short while ago... I went to visit with them... Liam Larry doesn't look well. Never mind that I have told my colleagues that I did not expect Liam Larry to be alive at the end of this semester. I still don't... I walked to the elevator with him and his family... I shook his hand and stepped away from the elevator door...
As the door closed, I thought to myself... "Good bye, Larry..." I doubt seriously that I will see him alive again...
This has been a tough academic year...
Robert died...
Another colleague was diagnosed with colon cancer last year about this time... he had surgery... it was bad... he went for a check up here just recently and discovered it had spread to his liver... he had surgery again... he won't be back this semester...
Yet another colleague with a host of medical issues had to take a medical leave of absence... he won't be back this year, and probably won't return...
That is four people out of not a very large group of professors... This is a reminder of how fragile... how delicate Life really is.
On a different tangent, I received an text from BoyShoes earlier this morning... it seems that his girl friend has been accepted into graduate school at a university some distance from here... He said he needs to talk to me... that he needs advice.... I am thinking that he doesn't figure into her plans. I will give him the best Fatherly advice I can give him... he and I are going to a late lunch at 2.30... He ended the conversation with "I love you, Dad..."
I had a text message exchange with GirlShoes last night... about issues between her and her Mom... She ended the conversation with "I really miss you, DadE... I love you..."
I'm honored that my kids come to me when they have these issues... I am glad I can be there for them...
There is uncertainty here at Alluvial Flood Plain State University, but my concerns are with my colleagues and my kids... Spring semesters are always more intense than Fall semesters... I really feel worn down this semester... I think I am not stressed, but maybe my recent blood pressure issues indicate otherwise...
Life sure is looking different right now...
I'm very tired...
I'm very exhausted...
~shoes~
Just remember ...this too shall pass! Think positive..and make it so. Spring is hear and summer winds are coming.
ReplyDeletetake care you...
Carol
yikes all around. sorry things are so heavy, and i hope for the best for all involved. thinking of you...
ReplyDeleteHey Obedience,
ReplyDeleteI'm sorry things are so rough right now - and really sorry for your friends and colleagues who are going through such terrible times. It stinks. You are lucky to have such a great relationship with your kids - and they are lucky to have you.
Sarah xxx
Sorry to hear that the going is tough at the moment. Sometimes life reminds us that we need to prioritise what really matters. Take care of yourself, keep your chin up and things will get better.
ReplyDeleteT
x
Sorry to hear that life is tough for you. It's sad that LL won't help himself but since he won't, you have done your best being a good friend.
ReplyDeleteGet some rest. Take care of yourself 'cause your awesome kids want you around to dispense that advice for a long time, I think.
Mustering up some positive energy to send your way! :)
The way I see it, it's all about priorities. Those would lie with your children, even though they are grown. It is awesome that they have you to lean on and look to for advice, not all of us have had those kind of relationships with our parents. I never would have thought of asking my Mother for advice for fear of hearing, yet again, how I was doing something wrong.
ReplyDeleteSorry to hear you are feeling, um, "blah". Maybe with the change of seasons it might help. Not sure just trying to throw a positive spin in there. I was thinking perhaps BoyShoes was going to say that she does want him to go but he isn't sure he wants to. Will be interested to see what it is about and I'm sure you will have wonderful advice. Love you Shoesie! :-)
Jesus Shoes you should be worrying about your own health, all those medical issues and bring you down.
ReplyDeleteI think that we sometimes forget how extremely fragile life is.
ReplyDeletePoor Liam Larry... I like him. :( And I'm a lil' skeert of his mother if she can take him down...
I'm glad Boy Shoes and Girl Shoes have you. A loving parent is just... awesome. And - hard to find. I like that you're a good Dad.
Now - deep breath... only a few more weeks... take care of you because your health is important... you are important to me.
xoxoxo
robelyn
@ Carol... yes, you are right about the positive thinking... more than anything, I just feel exhausted. I am so tired... so spent. But, I am taking care... :o) Thank you!
ReplyDelete@ Ms Magnolia... hey you! Yeah, the environment around here is heavy... contaminated... but, it will be okay... I am confident of it!
@ MisFits!!!! Hi there, Sarah, I am lucky to have my kids!! I do love them so!! I just worry about my friends... they don't take care of themselves. Life can be short!!!
@ Tuppence... hey you!! Yes, Life does talk to us about things like you've mentioned... we just have to be aware enough to pay attention! I've been taking care of myself... things are better... :o)
@ Ms Nitebyrd... thank you for the positive thoughts and energy... they are greatly appreciated. Liam Larry did tell his Mom that I was his best friend. That was special...
@ Just Another Girl... unfortunately, the messages you received from your Mom are the same messages that they receive from their Mom. I prefer the loving and affectionate side of being a Dad... of course, I can also be an asshole when I need to be... :o)
@ Bathwater... for the most part, I am just tired... I so need a break to come along and spell me... :oD Soon, I think... I hope all is well with you!!!
@ Gobbles... Liam Larry is a goofball... what can I say? I would be afraid of his Mom as well... I think she could whoop up on his ass big time!!
I hope I'm a good Dad... I certainly try to be... Yes, Just a few more weeks!!! I am taking care of myself... You are important to me as well... you goober...
~shoes
It's so hard to watch bad things happen to friends. :(
ReplyDeleteI have kids who ask my advice and say 'I love you' too. And they both hug us and kiss us goodnight. Or when we leave the house. Or they do.
And no matter what else is going on in life, the love from your kids is a huge and beautiful gift.
Hope things turn out well, or as well as can be expected. Sounds like a hell of a year so far.
I know we're strangers. Okay, I'm strange. So I will ((hug)) you anyway.
(I have big boobs if that makes it easier...)
@ Ami... You know, I knew that Mom and Dad loved me, people from that time maybe just didn't say it. I don't think their not telling me they loved me when I was younger affected me... as I said, I knew they did. But it has been important for me to tell my kids that I love them! I didn't want them to be the age I was when my parents first told me...
ReplyDeleteYou?Strange?? Imagine that... I am as well!!! :oD
Boob hugs are always nice... LOL
~shoes~
I think the fact that your kids come to you in times of need or just to remind you they love you is testament to the great father you are.. and how much they respect and admire you..
ReplyDeleteThere dear shoes.. is the bright spot in your cloudy day.
Hugs
did you call me a goober? that's yer ass now...
ReplyDeletexoxoxoxoxoxo
gobbles
Man, you need to get past this shit [end of semester] and get out there on the highway. Ride ride ride! Go to Vegas and misbehave, a lot! SMILE
ReplyDelete@ Flying Solo... Thank you so much for your comment. I try hard to be a good Dad. I was so torn down and apart during my divorce (long enough ago now) that to be referred to as a 'good' anything is still quite a compliment to me. Thank you, dear... :o)
ReplyDelete@ Gobbles... I did indeed call you a 'goober' and prolly called you a 'nutbar' as well!!! For the record, I am skeert of you...
@ Charlene... The end of the semester is a stone's throw away. The Spring semester is more difficult in that there is SO much that has to be completed by mid May. In the Fall Semester, it's ok for some of it to bleed forward into the Spring Semester.
I do intend to misbehave a lot... :oD
~shoes~